I am a whore

Not in the literal sence, I am an attention whore. I have a friend that has introduced me to a music website, where he is popular. Now in turn, he is asked alot to collaborate on projects with others, he says by doing this, it makes him a whore, as he does not usually turn down the requests he gets. I am an attention whore. I like to be the center of attention, no matter what I might say to the contrary. I am not proud of this fact, and it is not something that I share very often, but I find that it is very hard to stay on the side lines when there is a large group. I am a very shy person, that has the ability to talk to anyone. I am very insucure, and standoffish, but I have the knack of putting that to the side and diving into the thick of whatever situation I am in. I am very well spoken, and I know a little something about almost everything, as I hate looking or sounding stupid, but that is the end of it, once I am thru with the info that I have, I am at a loss, and that is when it all seems to start to fall apart. I think that is why I am not as social as some of the people I know. Small talk seems out of reach somehow. I have a good friend who lives in Orlando. I was living in California at the time and this friend of mine wanted to come to California for a visit. Now to give you some kind of clairty, I had only meet this person one time in the past, but we had had countless conversations on the phone, and were very close, as close as can be expected in the situation. Now getting back to the story, He arrived to Sacramento and we decided what we were going to do. It was settled that we would take a drive from Sacramento to Mt St. Helens in Washington. From Sacramento to Washington is a 13 hour drive, and another 13 hours back. I was in full painc mode. What the fuck am I gonna talk about with this person for 26 hours? It turns out we both never ran out of things to talk about, and it was one of the best times I have ever had. We got to the mountain, and there was a blizzard, so we had to turn around and go back home, it was a pointless trip, but I learned that you are only as intresting as you make yourself. It never hurts to push the limits of ones boundries, but it is hard sometimes, just making the leap can sometimes be to much..... Will it be for me?

Almost time for Hurricane season

Now I am not a fan of large devistating storms, but I do love a good, strong,  and loud thunderstorm. With the coming of Hurricane season, also means that it is also the start of the rainy season. Everyday round 3 or 4 the storms start, as the sea breeze collides with the hot air mass that is coming from the other side of the state, and BAM ready made thunderstorm. It is my favorite time of year. I know I am silly, but I love the rain, and I love the thunder, especially at night. 

Good Bye.....

Well as you might have heard Bea Arthur has died. She was famous for her work on stage with Angela Landsbury in Mame, and then on tv as Maude and then as Dorothy on the Golden Girls. She was a terrific actress and she will be missed. I have all the seasons of the Golden Girls on DVD, and it is on alomst all the time on one channel or another, so I can still get my fix, but a legand has gone. That now makes 2 from the show, as Estelle Getty Pre deceased her. Both were so funny, and now there are only 2 left. Please say a small prayer for Bea, lets hope she can find peace and comfort on her next journey!

Is there a happy middle ground?

I am sitting here tonight, and asking myself that title question. Is there a happy middle ground? A spot where you don't have all that you would like, but you are doing just fine, and are not really in need of anything at the moment. I would have to answer in the negitiave on that one at this point in time. I am not content and my mind is far from quiet. I try and sit in the dark, to quiet my mind, but I can't make the tumoult stop. My head is briming with nonsence and errant ideas, that have no substance, or value. I cannot seem to shake the clutter from the cobb webbed covered cornors of my over taxed mind. I would give up all I own,(which is not much) just to have peace and quiet. I am a very simple person wrapped up in a complicated man's life. I let stupid things get to me. You are the only one that creates your own outcomes. Your day is created and destroyed by you, and you alone. I have to remember that in the riggers of the day, the nonsence is just that, nonsence, ment to distract me from my higher goal, TO MAKE EACH DAY COUNT. I don't really make a difference in anyone's life as it is now. I have to live for me, and with my positive outlook, that will in turn helps others. 

April Newsletter finally finished

Well it is official, I have finally finished the April newsletter. It was long and involved, but it is finally complete. It was all about the NWO and FEMA and a few other surprises as well. I am amazed by the amout of information that I came across in my studying, and all this info is in plain sight. So if you are reading this and have no clue what newletter I am talking about, send me a comment with your email and I will send you a copy of the newsletter right away! Thanks to all those who helped keep me focused, it was needed, really...... If you want any info about the NWO and the shadow goverment and the like, you can visit http://www.illuminati-news.com/moriah.htm They are a great resource for information.

Hole in the wall places.

What ever happened to the old mom and pop style resturants? You know the kinda place with the over the hill wait staff that remembered your name and what you had to drink? That was service, It was not a chain, and the food was acctually made on site by people who knew it had to be good, if they wanted repeat buisness and a decent tip. The kinda place that had the best breakfast in town, and was only open till the end of the lunch rush. I miss those kinda places. I was talking to a friend of mine and he was expounding on this fact as well. He was with his daughter for a night out, and they were both starving, all the big chains were packed as it was a Friday night, so he hooked a U-turn and took a chance on a small family resturant, and he said it was amazing. That is what I mean, most of the time, you are going to have a great meal. We have gotton so used to in and out service, that we have forgotton what real food tasted like. Don't get me wrg, I love a cajin chicken sandwich from Chilli's, but I also love the friendly serivce and amazing food from a buisness that depends on the patranoge of its clientel. So my advice is go out and take a chance on a small resturant in your neighborhood. I assure you, it will be fast, cheap, and most likley the best meal you will have all day! 

Pea Soup Andersen

I have not lived in California for some time now, but I do remember when my friends and I would take a drive to L.A., We would stop in Santa Neila, about 2.5 hours outside Sacramento to a place called Pea Soup Andersen. I was against it the very first time. I assumed that they were over priced and the food would be terrible. I was right about one thing, they are insanely overpriced, however they have the most amazing Pea Soup I have ever had. I hate pea soup, it was never my favorite, but this soup was different. It's color was that of a mental hospital's walls, and it had the texture of very thin custard, but the taste was out of this world. The most amazing thing about this place is that they will bring you as much soup as you like, all for one kinda low price. The rest of the menu is where they got you. I just recenty found the recipe online and I am going to attempt to make this soup for myself. If it is half as good as I remember, I will be on cloud nine. The recipe is remarkably simple, as most good things are. I will post again as to the outcome of this adventure, and also post the recipe, with any revisions that I have made to get it exactly the way I remember it. Here's to fond memories of a time long ago when life was grand, and the possibilties were as far reaching as the toilet after the pea soup worked it's way down!  

Why can't the English teach there children.....

For some time now I have been on the look out for words that are spelled out very clearly, but always mispronounced. Some of you us these words alot and everytime that you pronounce them incorrectly, I wanna smach you on the head with something heavy. I am going to give you some of the examples that drive me batty, and I will also phaneticly spell them out for you, so you can spit them out correctly. 

The word(s):                               How YOU say it:                  How it should be said:

Iraq                                                  I-Rack                                       E-rock

Iran                                                  I-ran                                          E-Ron

Escape                                             X cape                                        S-cape

Wolf                                                 Woof                                           wool-f

Social Security                               Socil Security                           So-shal  sa cure it e

And so on and so on.....  I would love to hear some of yours. Drop a comment and let me know if these are few are universal......

Why does life has to be so hard?

I wonder why I am struggling right now with life. I am having a hard time with everything. I have no real social life to speak of, and I am not seeing anyone at the moment either. I am 30 and alone... It is hard to look at it in plain english. I have so much potential, and I am stalled in doing anything. I have so many ambitions and dreams, but I have done nothing to put them into action. Why am i rotting away, as life goes by? Why can't I get up and do what I know needs to be done. I am the cause of the suffering I am feeling, I am the soulution as well. I am my own worst enemy, and my greatest champion. I just need to find the motovation to get off my ass and do something that is worth wild. I am not sure what is is going to take, but I will get there, I am not sure how long that might take, but I am going to try to see it thru to the end.